Hi friends,
I am sharing a portion of a story I am writing right now. Please give me your genuine feedback or suggestions or whatever comes to your mind after reading this passage from my story which is as follows......
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It was 2.30 pm, very hot day in May, 1978 and I was standing next to the big red car, touching it all over from the back to the front of it as always whenever I was on my way back from my school. Most of the time, I was spending 5-10 minutes watching this red car as if it is asking me to come to her and praise her. I was very much attracted by her bold look, shinning colour and large size. I used to look inside through the neatly cleaned windows without touching them. Big chrome steering, black & red seats and shinning dashboard, at that moment for me this red car was one of the man made wonders. As I was admiring this creation with my curiosity and looks. Suddenly an old lady saw me touching this red car and also saw me peeping inside the car from her balcony. She asked me to stop there. I was scared to hear her voice as she is from the only wealthy family in our locality. I tried to run from there and suddenly someone hold me from my school bag on my back................
I am sharing a portion of a story I am writing right now. Please give me your genuine feedback or suggestions or whatever comes to your mind after reading this passage from my story which is as follows......
------------------------------------------------------------------
It was 2.30 pm, very hot day in May, 1978 and I was standing next to the big red car, touching it all over from the back to the front of it as always whenever I was on my way back from my school. Most of the time, I was spending 5-10 minutes watching this red car as if it is asking me to come to her and praise her. I was very much attracted by her bold look, shinning colour and large size. I used to look inside through the neatly cleaned windows without touching them. Big chrome steering, black & red seats and shinning dashboard, at that moment for me this red car was one of the man made wonders. As I was admiring this creation with my curiosity and looks. Suddenly an old lady saw me touching this red car and also saw me peeping inside the car from her balcony. She asked me to stop there. I was scared to hear her voice as she is from the only wealthy family in our locality. I tried to run from there and suddenly someone hold me from my school bag on my back................
